Life is not all about joy, but life without joy isn't a life at all

Joy and pain, sunshine and Rob...  Ok, so not exactly what I was thinking about, but once the first three words come out, it's hard not to start singing this Rob Base song.  (In fact this particular song has an even more specific meaning to me about friends I haven't seen in over 20 years)  Impressive, huh?  I digressed from a blog that I had not even started to write yet.

I'll admit, I've taken to lots of rants lately.  Even more than you get to see on this lovely website (just ask my family).  While I try to avoid deep ponderings in general, I especially try to avoid them on the internet.  Of course this would be an exceptionally short post if I just stuck with that philosophy, so we all know that won't happen.

About five months ago I went in to have my heart checked and all the fun blood work done associated with it.  All was fine, except the doctor noted my cholesterol was at the high good range or low border range, depending on how you want to look at it (when I tell this story to strangers I always say high good range, because I sound better that way).  I suspect normally you get talked to and sent on your merry way.  However, in an abundance of caution, to make sure all was well with my heart, he suggested I stop eating.  Ok, maybe he just said that I should see the dietitian, who is the one that said I should stop eating.  Fine, maybe she said I shouldn't eat so much saturated fat.  Understandable since I literally ate liquid fat (aka Qdoba cheese sauce) on a near constant basis.  In fact, I can honestly say I don't recall EVER reading the saturated fat content of anything.  However, I am not fairly certain that my diet would regularly consist of a "who's who" of saturated fat items, to the point that it could probably take down an elephant.  Thus, my journey of eating less than 15 grams of saturated fat a day began.  Most days that's really not an issue, but every now and then, when other people are eating pizza or having desert, it becomes very hard.  (like waving free brothel tickets to an adolescent boy, or front row Rent tickets if they aren't into that).

Then again today, there was an editorial in our newspaper from some woman complaining about "Cinnamon Roll Day".  For those of you not near here, it started by a 10 year old getting interested in something discussed during civics class.  As most 10 years do, he likes cinnamon rolls, so putting the two together, he made a petition by himself, got other kids at school to sign the petition, and then sent it along with a letter to the Governor.  The Governor responded and declared Cinnamon Roll day.  The result was admittedly a day full of cinnamon roll baking, eating and gluttony in general.  Even my lovely wife made the greatest cinnamon rolls ever, though I know for a fact the pan had like six cups of butter - no, I'm not exaggerating.  I know they were great because I ate one bite and it was awesome.  Anyway, the woman wrote an editorial saying that the news stories about Cinnamon Roll Day were inappropriate because of the childhood obesity problem we are facing, blah, blah, blah...  As if elementary school children across the city were sitting with the morning paper and a cup of coffee, oblivious to the wonders of cinnamon rolls until "Cinnamon Roll Day" was announced in the local paper, and they promptly ignored all their parents' encouragement to eat well and exercise and ran off to devour roll after roll!

Finally, tonight, I will be brief as I let my skeletons rocket out of the closet, but needless to say I was wrapped up in a poker game, made it to the final two, but then became distracted by my beautiful wife and made horrible play after horrible play - resulting in me being extremely irritated.  First let me clarify, "distracted by my beautiful wife" is not some code for her prancing around in a red lace camisole and vanilla perfume.  Ok, NOW it means that because I've got that image distracting me from this blog and she's not even here!  Anyway, she was on the phone, and of course I was irritated with myself at losing because I decided to answer her call.  Yes, over a game.  The very person I tell constantly to call me just to say hi, actually does that, and I'm distracted and irritable over a game.  Oh, I'm a genius.  If only I could identify me being a moron at the moment it is happening, that would be handy.

How do all of these fit together?  (Please God, let them all actually make sense together)  Simple, life is not all about joy, but life without joy isn't a life at all.  If someone else has said this before, I apologize, but after some thought, this really came down to what I felt.  We spend so much time focusing on avoiding problems and trying to accomplish goals, that we forget to live.  I could spend the next 40 years avoiding every single bad food, and for what purpose?  To live extra long without one of the greatest joys of life?  I could focus on meaningless accomplishments by not paying as much attention to my wife or children, and then who would care?  

It's no secret that for centuries the answer has been floating around.  Moderation.  Yes, watch what you eat, exercise, be responsible, but when an occasional opportunity arises, have a cinnamon roll, enjoy a steak, live! Play games and go after goals and accomplishments, but realize that these things only mean something if you have people around  you to share them with, so stop and listen to them, there will always be things to accomplish, but your loved ones may not always be there.

There are obstacles, hard work, stress, anger, sadness, life is not all about joy, nor should it be as these other things make joy even more enjoyable, but if you work so hard to avoid some simple pleasures because they might be a tiny bit bad for you, that's not a life at all.

Magic Cow and Stupidity Tax

In the grocery store tonight I walked up to the dairy cooler to grab some milk.  It's at that point I saw my two choices sitting side by side.  Store milk for $2.80 or organic milk for $5.50.  I'm sorry, what?  That is literally about 100% more expensive.  What in the world is in organic milk (yeah, yeah I know the question is really what's NOT in it)?  Is "organic milk" code for "human breast milk" because that's the only way I can think of it being that much more expensive!  I mean with my less expensive milk, I even get a dose of human growth hormone!  Holy cow!  (sorry couldn't help it)

Then on my way out, I stop to grab a Powerball lottery ticket (can't win if you don't play).  They are now $2.  Again, really?  100% increase?   As if I don't feel stupid enough for paying my "math tax" - a tax on people who are horrible at math, as it's more likely you'll get hit by a meteorite than win the lottery.  Now I feel twice as stupid!  Why exactly does it cost twice as much?  Was $40 million not enough?  We have to charge twice as much so the jackpot can go up to $80 million?  I was happy to pay my $1 and go off for 3 or 4 days and pretend I would win several million dollars.  In fact, it was almost a chore to try to even keep $1 handy, now they think I'm going to keep $2 around?  Unlikely.  In fact, they will likely just end up with people buying fewer tickets, as it's doubtful everyone's "gambling" budget just doubled.  Of course, it is gambling, who am I kidding, people will just stop buying freaking organic milk so they can afford their lottery tickets.

Small Jobs Say A Lot

I think lots of people start to go into auto pilot when they start doing small routine projects at work.  Then when the big difficult projects come they focus, stress and hope people notice how great they did.  I would like to propose the opposite, that by concentrating on smaller tasks and doing an outstanding job on those, that others start to take notice.  For example, let's say I went and got a haircut yesterday.  Given my hair is so thin and straight (and parts aren't even there anymore), the difficulty of giving me a haircut on a scale of 1 to 10 is about a -2, I mean seriously rubbing a pair of clippers over my head for 3 minutes is hardly a taxing experience.  So, you would think that it could be done without error.  Unfortunately, allow me to refer you to my earlier comment about auto pilot.  Now I'm sure she did a fantastic job on the bride-to-be earlier in the day, and she was spooky at how technical she got discussing hair color on some guy sitting next to me (who the hell even knew you could use gold as a hair color base?).  So my genius of a stylist did great on these other projects, but it's my simple one I'm concerned about!  This morning I wake up and drag myself to the bathroom.  Now recently I would see my hair sticking up everywhere, looking like a twin of Jim on "Taxi".  However, given that I just had all my hair buzzed off, that was not the expected appearance in the mirror this morning.  On the plus side, that's not what I saw.  Instead I saw Alfalfa from the Little Rascals.  That's right a buzz cut with a tuft of hair on the top of my head!  Just sticking up in a little tangled mess hovering over the rest of my head.  Just think, if she had spent the time to focus for 3 minutes, this simple task could have made her look like a rock star!  Instead, she focused on something else and after a day of walking around as a hair unicorn, she is anything but impressive to me.

Amen Craig Ferguson

I couldn't say it better, so I just posted it...

Chivalry

Today, well almost every day now, I run into at least one news article about a candidate for political office.  The candidates themselves have almost reached the point where they have determined the only way for them to win is to tear down the other candidate.  It's not just the candidates either, party sponsored websites, commercials, flyers, etc...  It has evolved into a test of who can survive the most mud slinging.  So I started looking at all these comments (even those posted by the average reader are pretty nasty), and it dawned on me what is now missing.  Chivalry.  I can rant about how it's missing in our every day existence later, but for now what about just our politics?  Being a leader should include more than who has the best speaking ability on television, who looks the best in a tux, or who degrades their opponent the most.  Being an elected official should involve putting your ideas and plans out there and your opponent doing the same.  Don't like your opponent's idea, great, politely explain why and then reinforce why you believe in your idea.  You don't have a counter idea?  Then don't say anything.  Courtesy, respect, honor, try using one of these.  We won't all like every idea that someone else has, I mean hell I don't even like every idea I have, how can you expect I'll like every idea someone else pops out?  The difference is we should show enough courtesy and respect to the other person that we simply listen and then explain why we disagree, not listen and then run ads about their life 30 years ago or radio spots about their past marriage.

I want to know why you are better!  I want to know why your plan will work!  Telling me your opponent sucks doesn't explain why you don't suck too - maybe that's the point to chivalry, let the other guy ruin it for himself.

Back to Reality

When exactly is it appropriate to "un-decorate" from Christmas?  Is it me or does anyone else start to get a mild panic attack when you pull baby Jesus from the nativity scene, wrap him up in some paper and stick him in a box!!  It's like a kidnapping script in Clockwork Orange and I've got Mary and Joseph as witnesses to testify against me!  Unless Mother Teresa is willing to flip sides I'm screwed.  Seriously, when can I feel ok about this?  One week?  Two weeks?  A month?  My issues won't change over time, but my embarrassment of having Christmas stuff out for my neighbors and co-workers to see eventually becomes too over-powering!  I'm partially sure this is why Valentine decorations and St. Patrick's paraphernalia are popular, they are like nicotine patches for our Christmas decoration addiction!

You know you are jealous!  Yes it was good!

Anti-Resolutions

A new year is upon us.  How do I know?  Easy, every commercial on television and the radio is talking about "your new year's resolution to get in shape/go to school/get some sort of cosmetic surgery/get a job - the list goes on.  It's true, every year most people set out to become better people and stop doing the things they are not happy about.  A fantastic idea, don't get me wrong, but I always end up with a bad taste in my mouth by the middle of January.  For the next two weeks everyone will be talking about "doing better" and how they wish they could stop smoking or drinking or whatever it is... Isn't anyone happy?  Holy crap, by the time January 15th hits everyone will have spent two entire weeks fixated on their bad habits and constantly thinking about how much happier they would be if they could just change!  These are awesome plans, people should always try to improve themselves, but honestly if all you do it focus on stuff you want to change (which correct if I'm wrong, but it's stuff we haven't been able to fix in ourselves for decades, so the odds of us doing it all of a sudden in two weeks is slim), what will you feel like by the end of January?  What will you feel like when all the bad stuff is still there and you have been unsuccessful in changing it?  Don't stop trying, by all means, pick up the torch and run!  Make a better you!  But, don't forget to think about all the things you are happy about!  Think about your family and the fun you've had together.  Think about your successes at work.  Think about the good times you've had with friends.  Think about the things you have done to help others.  Think about your health.  Think about your children's health.  Some of these things may have gone poorly this year - or maybe it's been a horrible year and all of these things have gone bad.  If so, start small.  Think about how quiet it is in the morning when you wake up and that you have an entire new day to either start to climb out of your hole, or spend with your family. 

As for me, sure I've got a list of crap to fix.  Problem is I've had this list for years.  I'll give it another go, who knows maybe one or two of them will stick this time.  Realistically I'll still be ornery and rant a lot.  I'll likely still think I'm too big for my britches, and will be oblivious to the fact that instead of every other driver being clueless, it may be my issue.  For my friends and family's benefit, I pray at least one of my delightful personality traits drifts towards the light.  Until that time comes, I'll keep remembering how proud my children make me, how amazed I am to be married to such a beautiful and caring wife who manages to orchestrate our family so well (and for some unknown reason still puts up with me), and just exactly how enjoyable it is to be up before the sun with a cup of coffee wondering what will happen today... 

Cereal Snake Oil

I'm sitting here this morning eating Boo Berry Cereal.  It's not great, I'll be honest.  Problem is nobody else in my house seems to be willing to eat it.  This includes the culinary geniuses who selected this gem of a cereal.  Don't get me wrong, I want my children to eat breakfast and enjoy it, so we generally let them pick some cereal out and usually they do a decent job.  However, every once in a while they hit upon a dud.  And by dud I mean horribly bad cereal that even the stores can't seem to sell and just save them for next year.  Yes, I am convinced that Boo Berry was manufactured in 1984 and has been stockpiled in a warehouse in southeast Asia.  Originally this cereal probably wasn't even blue, but the storage time has collected SARS, mold, avian flu and other "spices" that give the cereal its delightful shade of blue that does not naturally appear in the color spectrum.  Now, it's not even the fact that these cereals are so bad that annoys me (ok, it is, but that's not the main problem).  Unfortunately I refuse to throw out food, even bad food.  Instead, I'm sitting here in the morning starting my day off by EATING this stuff.  I don't blame the rest of my family for shunning these foods, I mean they are nasty, so the only remaining possibility is for me to eat it.  So my frustration is actually with the cereal makers who make this crap.  Seriously?  Blue cereal?  Marshmallows with the consistency of chalk from my 5th grade class?  Then to have the balls to make the milk turn creamy blue - seriously it's bad enough they ruined the cereal, but now they insist on making my milk look like whale sperm on top of it?  Ugh, I wish I could just be wasteful and dump it in the trash, but I can't, plus I've got to finish it to get that stupid box top for the school, right?

It's You, Not Her

I've stopped laughing just long enough to get this post up.  On YouTube today I came across various songs, but they all seemed to have pictures of beautiful women as the "video".  I assume to entice men to click on their video.  I'm still not sure what the point is to that, but maybe they gain something from higher click volumes.  Anyway, I was enjoying these songs and then noticed a common theme to most of the comments left by people.  At least 90% of them commented on how attractive the pictures of these women were and then proceeded to explain how willing they would be to have sex with these women.  What can I say, I'm starting to laugh again just thinking about it.  Let me see if I've got this straight, some complete loser who surfs YouTube seeking random pictures of women would be willing to have sex with some of the most gorgeous women on the planet (well at least the most gorgeous photo shopped women)?  Do I have this right?  Well no crap.  Let's be honest these guys are probably having sex with themselves so adding ANY other person into the equation would be a win for them.  Now, for these women, these guys are not so much a win.  In fact if they even knew what these guys were saying they would likely throw up a bit, so the idea of actually doing these things would fall somewhere below scratching their own eyes out with toothpicks!  Meanwhile these guys continue  to glide through cyberspace leaving message upon message of their hormonal desires, blissfully unaware of how rancid their actual presence is to the rest of us, much less the objects of their desire.

Legislating History

PARIS - French lawmakers easily passed a measure Thursday to make it a crime to deny the mass killings of Armenians in 1915 by Ottoman Turks amounted to genocide. Turkey swiftly retaliated, ordering its ambassador home and halting official contacts, including some military cooperation.

Umm, I'm sorry, but what?  Did France really pass a law that makes it a crime to say an alleged event almost 100 years ago didn't happen?  If anyone alive at the time of the event is even alive, they had to be small children!

I think my love of Paris is well known, but come on France, legislation history?  Even worse to criminalize a statement about history?  We have people with massive reality delusions who claim the holocaust didn't happen, and even those people aren't arrested for such stupid ramblings.  

No matter how ridiculous a position is about history or events in history, the legislature should not be involved in criminalizing or requiring an agreement about history!

Leave it to the rest of us, thanks to the BCS we don't have college football to debate - ok poor example - but we can at least argue about 1915 history, or maybe the righteousness of the War of 1812 or Franco-Russian War!

Eggnog Drivers

It's Christmas Time!  Snow, trees, presents, lights, music, coats,
children, hot chocolate, singing, etc... Of all of the wonders of Christmas
time, probably the item that needs the most scrutiny is eggnog.  Why?
 Simple, there must be some magical component to eggnog that shuts down the
part of the brain that allows people to drive well.  Yes, eggnog must be
the active ingredient to the Seasonal Inability to
Correctly-drive Syndrome ("SICS").  SICS seems to affect all educational
and socio-economic levels.  Whether you are at Wal-mart or Nordstrom's,
SICS is evident in most drivers.  The holiday season has a massive increase
in bone-head driving maneuvers, from the woman who drove down the wrong way
on a one-way parking lot aisle and starred at me like I was insane for
taking up the entire one car width lane; or the guy in front of me going 10
mph in a 30 because he assuredly was doing gold bearer-bond transactions on
his cell phone in order to pay for Christmas.  Or better yet, the driver
who accelerates to mach 5 in the parking lot to getdown the aisle faster
than me, so he can do a 26 point turn into a diagonal spot going my
direction. SICS seems to be a daily, if not hourly, interference this time
of year.  Which brings me to the only logical conclusion, eggnog has some
component that shuts down human reasoning and common sense.  Given that the
only other conclusion is people become giant butt-holes due to holiday
stress, I think I prefer to go with the eggnog theory, thus we must all
boycott eggnog in order to eliminate SICS.

Wazz Uupp?

Like many things in life, my taste for spicy food seems to change over time.  At one point Pace was about the most adventurous I'd go.  Tobasco is the gateway drug to hot sauce.  It's good, don't get me wrong, but after a while you just start looking for that hotter spice or bigger flavor.  That's when it gets nasty.  Habanero, Serrano, the things you try goes on and on.  Currently the love of my spice life is Wasabi.  It's a beautiful thing.  Not only does it mean I'm probably eating sushi (something I've developed an enjoyment for), but it means I get that massive burn in my nostrils that can only come from wasabi.  You know what I mean don't you?  It's like temporary syphilis for your nose.  Of course the burn ends quickly and the only way to get that joyous wasabi jolt again is to keep eating it.  If only they could infuse it with vitamins my life would be complete!  Well, at least until I move on to the next burning desire!  (sriracha anyone?)

Facebook Killed The Blog

This morning I saw a link on Facebook to a woman's blog outlining all the reasons she wants to punch mommies in the throat that are overachieving elf on the shelf moms.  It was hilarious!  This prompted me to read other posts she had and I loved them.  In the end I sat there wondering why I seem to have stopped all my ultra-witty, everyone can't stop reading them, posts?  The conclusion was Facebook.  I'm really starting to hate Facebook.  Not only do I have to see various friend recommendations of people I never want to talk to, hell I'm barely a decent enough person to the "friends" I have, but I'm becoming increasingly irritated with the hide and seek game they seem to play with everyone's posts!  Facebook is like the U.S.A. Today for online posts.  Say it in 2 or 3 lines and move on.  Hell no!  I ramble on and on, just ask my kids.  I can say the same thing 8 different ways and then defend it when you say I'm repeating myself!  But I digress.  So screw you Facebook, I refuse to continue to fit my thoughts into your word count.  Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, free at last - I'm sure this is what he was really talking about.  Game on.

Welfare vs. Charity

I've been able to read a few articles recently that go into the philosophical foundations of the purpose of government.  I know, a little light reading.  It is truly a difficult and gut-wrenching decision when the issue of the government caring for those in need arises.  When the federal government raises over a trillion dollars in taxes, it is near impossible to argue that giving $25,000 or $30,000 to someone who is disabled is nothing from our treasury, but would make a world of difference to that person. On a case by case basis, it would seem heartless and without basis to deny this tiny assistance to this disabled person.  However, there are two factors that make we wonder if it is the government that should take on this or if it is us, as people that should do it.  First, the amount of money necessary to care for one person is insignificant, but what about caring for a million people?  It is a principle I teach my children, if you pick up your room every day, it is almost no work at all, but if you just let it build up day after day, eventually it becomes an overwhelming task.  One payment is easy, but a million payments is overwhelming.  Second, and more importantly, the government was established for limited functions, because when the United States was founded, we placed primary responsibility on our lives and others with ourselves, not the government.  The government should collect taxes only sufficient to cover the necessary functions, so really there never should be "excess" funds that could even pay for such benevolent care.  Because the Constitution was amended to allow for taxation, but did not include any limitations on what it could be collected for or what it must be spent on, it turned the authority over to the government.  The government then functions as a self-serving institution, willing to tax and distribute funds based on the best accumulation of votes, not on the obligations of the government.

Does this mean I oppose charity and caring for those in need?  Very much the contrary, but I do oppose the government being the institution that undertakes this function.  Consider if the government limited taxation and did not collect more than necessary to fund necessary operations.  Decreased taxation would mean each person had more money.  Ahhh, now the tricky part.  Would people take that additional money and contribute it to charities, to churches and to other institutions designed to help those in need?  Hopefully.  That is after all how our country was founded - taking responsibility for ourselves and others.  Which I believe brings us right back to the fundamental question - what if everyone doesn't take care of others?  Who will?  Wouldn't it be better to have all of us, through the government, care for those in need?  I acknowledge this would remove the issue of whether "everyone" contributed to caring for those in need, but such a system must fail for a variety of reasons.  Amongst those reasons, is the fact that morality should never be legislated.  Yes, we should all help those in need, but we can not "force" everyone to help those in need.  The United States has drawn a proverbial line in the sand between the government caring for all of us and the People taking care of ourselves.  That line falls squarely between the welfare system and our system of charity.  Freedom includes wonderful things, such as the opportunity for everyone to work hard and earn a good living, the freedom to speak their mind, the freedom to worship as they choose.  Such freedom also comes with the price of having to hear things we don't want to, having to take on some responsibility that in other countries the government does tend to, and having to accept that not everyone will be caring or generous.

So, it is after careful consideration that I find it necessary to suggest that government welfare and care of all, while a noble and wonderful thing, is not in keeping with the requirements and foundations of the United States.  Instead, it should be an ongoing movement of all People that they contribute to the care and charity of others, and equally important, that they encourage others to do the same.  The dependence on government fosters a society unable to care for itself.

Delta II Rocket Lift-off

No story.  No comment.  Just like looking in amazement at this picture of a Delta II rocket lifting off on October 28, 2011.

Original photo on CNN

2005 YU55

Asteroid 2005 YU55 is coming!  What does that mean?  Well, aside from allowing astronomers to map the surface of an asteroid, not much.  Information from NASA says:

NASA scientists will be tracking asteroid 2005 YU55 with antennas of the agency's Deep Space Network at Goldstone, Calif., as the space rock safely flies past Earth slightly closer than the moon's orbit on Nov. 8. Scientists are treating the flyby of the 1,300-foot-wide (400-meter) asteroid as a science target of opportunity - allowing instruments on "spacecraft Earth" to scan it during the close pass.

Tracking of the aircraft carrier-sized asteroid will begin at 9:30 a.m. local time (PDT) on Nov. 4, using the massive 70-meter (230-foot) Deep Space Network antenna, and last for about two hours. The asteroid will continue to be tracked by Goldstone for at least four hours each day from Nov. 6 through Nov. 10. Radar observations from the Arecibo Planetary Radar Facility in Puerto Rico will begin on Nov. 8, the same day the asteroid will make its closest approach to Earth at 3:28 p.m. PST.

The trajectory of asteroid 2005 YU55 is well understood. At the point of closest approach, it will be no closer than 201,700 miles (324,600 kilometers) or 0.85 the distance from the moon to Earth. The gravitational influence of the asteroid will have no detectable effect on anything here on Earth, including our planet's tides or tectonic plates. Although 2005 YU55 is in an orbit that regularly brings it to the vicinity of Earth (and Venus and Mars), the 2011 encounter with Earth is the closest this space rock has come for at least the last 200 years



Read more or just see NASA's Asteroid Watch

Most information originally from NASA

Times They Are A Changin'

Over the past few days I've had the chance to see a variety of pictures, both old and new, that demonstrate how vastly different the same person can be over their life. Tonight I read a few articles about Steve Jobs, who died today, and again saw he changed over time. The part that really amused me about all of it was that I am somewhat convinced I haven't changed at all. Yes, I realize I am wrong in this notion, but the idea persists, everyone else changes and I stay the same. Admit it, you think the same thing too. You see yourself as the same person you were 10, 20 or 30 years ago. Maybe a different job, house, etc... but personality, likes, beliefs, they are the same, right? I will venture a guess that's false, but we just either don't admit it or are for some reason frightened by it.

Some people do not like their parents, so maybe they are worried they are "becoming their parents". Some people were so adamantly liberal or conservative in their youth, maybe they are worried when their views conflict now from those they held so hard in the past. Maybe you were beautiful, exciting and fun and just don't want to believe that has changed. Whatever the reason, it seems most people cling to their own view of themselves and spend the rest of their lives trying to make everything fit back into that mold.

Unfortunately, life doesn't want to play along with our game. Personally I think I've resisted the notion that I've changed. I think for me it was simply the idea that I enjoyed my 20's so much - like more than any person should enjoy them - that the idea of changing worried me that it wouldn't be as good, so you assume nothing has changed, that I'm the same now as I was 20 years ago. In a related idea, it has also dawned on me that the fact I am allowed to raise children may be a massive oversight on the part of... well the planet Earth. Seriously, you want me molding a person? Three of them? Scary. Who actually thinks they are organized and mature enough to raise children? No, really I'm asking because I need them to come over. I mean really, I pick people up from soccer, drop them off at choir, talk to them when they finish their shift at work to make sure they are ok, and then I'm shooting stupid red birds at pigs, or making an ass out of myself at a poker game, or wondering why all beer doesn't come with nitrogen. But I digress.

My humor in the fact I was allowed to breed aside, I really don't see me as different than 20 years ago. Then I see everyone else, and well, they're different. So I must be different too, right? Yup. Honestly, it's not so bad. Yes, I have enormously fond memories of high school (I won't go into detail because one of my kids may actually read this). College, ahhhh, if I could live my entire life in college, well I'd be dead, but for four years it was certainly fantastic and I love every single one of the people that made it so great (those stories are for another post as well). Am I that same person? Yes and no. I see now that I have clearly changed over time and only recently have I realized, thank goodness! Teens and Twenty-somethings have a lot of fun, but good god they make a ton of horrific decisions. I made a ton of horrific decisions, they didn't all turn out bad (the end result doesn't dictate whether it was a poorly made decision), some even turned out great.

The irony is that we see young people and pray they change, then those young people grow up and we don't think we've changed. Truth be told, most of us gain experience (and hopefully some wisdom) as we get older. With that experience you lose some of the excitement that comes with blindly running through life at full speed in your teens and 20's. It's a trade off, one I would gladly make again and again. My teens and 20's were awesome, but they are gone. I won't miss them though. I'm old enough now that I know what to do and young enough to do it. Ahhh, the 40's and 50's look like they are going to be incredible!!!!!

My Lobster

I Should Apologize Now

Everyone seems to want to lower the deficit and lower the debt.  Problem is not seems to agree on how to do it.  Let's be honest, almost every expenditure that exists is there because a group of people want it.  Politicians don't spend money for nothing.  What?  That's right, they actually have a reason for spending money and it's to get votes.  Expenditures equal votes.  Oh, yes you too.  In fact, let's be clear, a tax reduction without a corresponding reduction in spending, is... an expenditure.  So even if you don't use any government program, but you tell your representatives to lower your taxes (and don't tell them to cut spending at the same time) you are asking for an expenditure.  So yes, our current deficit and debt are a direct result of our representatives "buying" our votes.  Are they to blame?  Absolutely, as representatives are there to make responsible decisions and explain them.  Instead, the status quo has become a representatives giving hand outs to everyone and saying "see what I gave you?  vote for me!" because they are too scared (or dumb) to explain why they had to say "no".  Oh don't worry, the other half of the equation is us - we were just too greedy to question where the hell all this "stuff" came from!  Picture this, a husband and wife where their household income is $50,000.  One spouse regularly comes home with fun stuff (t.v.'s, computers, cars, vacations, dining out, etc...) and to any obvious onlooker they are spending at least $75,000 a year.  Which one is to blame?  The spouse that overspent year after year or the other spouse who didn't want to ask how they were affording everything because they enjoyed it so much?  That's our lovely marriage between voters and representatives.
Great, so we know we are all to blame, now what?  Well, I have to admit, I've been going on a hunt for numbers.  Numbers that would prove that millionaires just aren't paying their fair share and should pay higher taxes.  Unfortunately, that's not what I found, and I found it on the Congressional Budget Office website.  In short, millionaires who pay taxes, pay a higher percentage of their income than anyone else, and their taxes make up a huge percentage of our overall federal budget (as in the top 5% paid 44.3%), assuming I can read massively boring bureaucratic number tables.  This is not what I expected and got worried that, well, we're screwed.  However, if you notice something in that statement a few sentences back, I said "millionaires who pay taxes".  Turns out, they don't all pay a lot of taxes.  The last estimate I saw was that the tax code is about 64,000 pages long and is full of loopholes.  Apparently, what I was missing in these numbers is that not everyone PAYS taxes.  Huh?  So, I looked around at ways that might remedy this.  Are you ready?  It's not new, but really it sort of is - the flat tax.  Now, this is not a welcome to 1994 flashback and we can all fall asleep while Steve Forbes does his hard push on the postcard tax return.  First of all, that was boring as sin.  Second, his version was sort of like the voodoo economics version of flat tax.  Anyway, why does this hold some promise?  Because it captures everyone.  It doesn't increase the tax rate on the richest, it simply captures more people.  If there are 300,000 millionaires and 250,000 were paying taxes, well, you see how that helps, right?  I'm also not talking about a pure flat tax where everyone pays, say 10% (totally made up number, that may be way too much or way little, so don't use that number in any argument you may have later), I'm talking about a graduated system, with tax rates increasing with income, or standard deductions increasing with income.  Yes, this may actually mean some of us pay more.  Trust me, I'm actually extremely scared to find the hard math numbers on this, since I personally itemize deductions.  The mortgage deduction is my personal best friend on April 15th, but the purpose is not to "raise" taxes on the middle class, instead, the purpose is to simply capture everyone in the same bracket equally.  If you make $25,000 you should pay the same as others with your income.  If you make $100,000,000 you should pay the same as, well the other guy that makes that much.
So we're all better now, right?  Not exactly.  While that will increase revenue by hopefully keeping taxes about the same per bracket, but capturing more people, it doesn't undo the United States' version of the Imelda Marcos shoe buying disease.  I mean seriously, if I had a $14.3 trillion debt, even increasing my income 10% isn't going to dent that puppy.  Well then, why did we even bother talking about this?  First, it's fair.  Second, it does increase revenue without increasing anyone's tax burden already paying their fair share (yes, including the wealthy who already pay).  Third, anything we can do to increase revenue is going to make this next part less painful.
Load up the truck, we've got to take some of this stuff back to the store.  Let's face it, we spend a lot.  Let's just start with the big ones:  Social Security, Medicaid, Defense.  Social Security - should I say it?  It's hard I know, because the AARP is the single largest voting block in the United States, and those seniors will kick your ass.  However, it's got to change.  We are down to around 2:1 for our workers:retirees ratio, a ratio that was up to around something like 12:1 when it started.  It just can't be sustained.  But by saying it can't be sustained, I'm not saying it has to go now.  Be realistic, there are massive amounts of people relying on it.  So, be clear and realistic.  Say in 10 years, the retirement age increases.  Limit benefits to people who have paid into the system.  Last but not least, disability social security - I'm truly sorry, but I have seen way too many people who are on disability that have absolutely no business being on it (and admittedly I've seen some who can't get it that should be) - is there a reason we can't have random inspections of homes and people on disability?  Medicaid - honestly I won't even touch the number of people on it, because that's small compared to the other drain - the cost of medical care.  There is no nice way to say it - you either agree that at some point we have to cut off medical care or you think we should pay for medical care regardless.  One we can't pay for and the other is heartless (and you seem to dislike it so much more when you are the one not getting the medical treatment).  So how do you compromise between these two?  Well, being as it's a compromise that may result in death, I'm sure nobody will like it, but set a cap on expenditures per person per year.  This should take care of most medical issues that come up, but not all the major ones.  Could people die from this policy?  Possibly, but my greater hope is that the health care industry, churches, non-profits, neighbors, friends, etc... will come together and address this "uncovered" situations.  As heartless as I feel even suggesting the idea, the reality is that the government can not and should not cover every possible expense.  We have certainly progressed economically to a point where we can support helping some, but our hearts are bigger than our pocketbooks.  We are not the government's responsibility, the government is our responsibility.  Our family and friends, well, that's up to us.  Defense - we spend twice as much of are GDP on defense than the number 2 country, and we spend around $700,000,000,000 on defense where the next closest spends around $115,000,000,000.  I'm not suggesting a wholesale gutting of our defense (trust me, I'd double it if I could - well, maybe 50% and give the rest to NASA), but even a $100,000,000,000 cut keeps us WAY ahead of everyone.  As for all the other expenses - yup, they get cut, a little.
I know, most of you went to bed somewhere around flat taxes, but if you made it all the way to here - you really need to get a life.  I mean really, I write this crap down because it rattles around in my head until I do, but what's your excuse for reading it?  Ok, I'll admit my numbers are rough, but the initial concepts are there.  We can do this and we can do this with relatively little pain if we do it now.  If we bury our heads and pray the economy improves and that'll fix it, then our kids will suffer an unimaginable horror of a country crushed by debt, an economy stopped in its tracks and a government pointing fingers at everyone else.
Compromise, it's not a four letter word - really.